dal

I am not obliged to update regularly nor put up posts to your interests.

here's how it goes. i'll most likely reply on your tagboard. but if you don't have one, the reply goes here.

cikgu is pissed off and so am i. i mean who is not worried when his/her strongest subject drops and that's his/her only subject he/she can rely on?? i admit it's partially our fault for not being that active during lessons but still, they're biased.

oh-oh. my basics got mixed up during the math test. i didn't manage to complete the paper. some people can even pronounce the test easy.
science is just as pathetic. we were expected to give long answers for digestion yet they gave us short lines with little marks. i was too indulged in completing the questions i din realise time was up. i didn't manage to finish. fortunately, only the whole of last page was undone; worth 5 marks.


chronicle of tompok

improvised house for tompok & her kittens.

[inside] she's being protective.

after a few days tompok hid them(we think so), there they were found behind the letterbox, struggling by themselves

I grabbed kak mard's mp3 & let it blast through the earpiece. I chose sentimental songs even though it might sharpened the "misery" inside. It simply suited my mood. Well, not exactly misery...
it was the feeling of...happy for others, yet sad for myself...I wished I could just blame others for making it happened but I suppose it was MY fault afterall.
I don't think it was envy. It was regret.
I had missed out. a lot.
Through the sentimental songs, it suddenly gushed through my mind; all the things which didn't really matter to me initially. I wanted the clock to stop ticking...
& the environment...it was like as if it was the past. My decent childhood.
The feeling was just...indescribable.
I just felt like tearing out. But no. in front of my sis? Nah...
Instead, I mouthed the lyrics of the song. Like pouring out my feelings.
Gradually, I changed to rock and r&b. as usual, it made me groove to the music. A tinge of smile broke out.
Time past damn fast. I had been listening to the mp3 for nearly an hour. I had to continue my science.

i knew i'd regret going for it. i want to join the craze & cheer for ole.
in the end i will not be going for npdp tomorrow. quite sad. this is all confusion. marshalling was told last minute...syf...goh. different infos from different squadmates.

tompok hid her kittens before i can even take picture of them with their opened eyes. it's like as if she knows we're going to dump them at nearby market so that they have easy access to food & for our convenience of visiting them. either that or the kittens got lost.
kak hafi & i decided to name them doncha, baby(we were watching the s'pore idol advertisement :P) & clone. they've grown so big over a short period of time.

last month, mum said that aunt said this when she saw kak mard on the wedding day, "mard melawa". i was like, what?! you compare her with others is like they're even more dressed up la. like suya & sula always put on thick make-ups. & they were applying it in the kitchen where everybody else was busy. not forgetting their dangling & trendy accesories. whereas kak mard was wearing a kurta with a long scarf around her neck on that day. & a viatnamese suit with a sweet flower-clip the next day. She only used eyeliner. i'm not criticising but comparing.
this view affects me because mum will think that she's not the only one who thinks kak mard is over-dressed. which means we're spending too much on clothes. please lah, i got only a few pathetic clothes. that's partly why i refuse to go out with my friends.
as in really pathetic; 2 pair of jeans currently.

people seem to be picking on us.

we're not the only class who has attire problem ok. go check other classes & almost the whole class will stand i tell you.

i feel lousy & clumsy today.
my drills was sucky.
& i kept banging into things.

this week schedule quite packed.
yesterday i had something to settle with something.
today had mcc, then drill prac.
tomorrow, syf.
the day after tomorrow, rehearsal.
friday, i'm trying to have a meeting with my history group before sports day.
& i have to spread my studying of literature over these packed days,
or rather, nights,
by thursday.
not only that, i've to copy literature notes only during school hours.
which means no proper recess or breaks for me.
& i still have time to blog.

Gone are the morning apt days (poof!). where I took early morning buses. The uncrowded buses ma'ams also took. where we walked to school & then rushed to class (seperately, duh). The school was alive on those mornings. We were the last ug to abolish this morning system.

random thought: We were once so "close". Lightyears, my ac group, particularly.
The cubicle we shared. The lunch we cooked together. The laughter we had when we prepared for campfire item. The punishments we bore together.
I personally find that the big sweep was the toughest because I was full of the womanly blood. To make it worse, my hair was all over the place(it was way short that time). My period did affect my mood.

they are right. Ac is tough but leaves you great experience & memories. Once you start talking about it, it may never end. & while you're still sec 1, enjoy ac. You've got them to lean on.

I wonder why we are not allowed to have close contact with them. It's like you work together & become close for a period of time. After that, it's forbidden.
But then I realised why. They'll one day take over the unit. We need to respect them as ncos.

Huma asked me whether I know this person named nur syazwani who claimed that I am her cousin & schoolmate. Curious, I asked huma more about her calmly. Huma complaint that I was asking too much. What the...
Maybe it's because she doesn't know what this name meant to me. anyway, syazwani mane pulak ni...

Baha was being an irritating freak just now. I was helpin' mum & kak mard to hold their things while they browsed around. So here it started. he was like kicking me, punching my stomach/ on my back, rubbing my eyes/nose with the sword balloon, standing on my legs, & worst, flipping up a little the back of my t-shirt. EXCUSE ME, do you know that we were in masjid?! How idiotic can you get? Besides that, how can you not respect my modesty?!
To make it worse, mum was like shouting at us. Nolah, actually she was talking to us but you know, she talks in a shouting tone.
I helped out by preparing banana for frying.
I also saw 2 seniors there helping out in 1 of the booths. met mak odah too.
kak mard bought a heart-flower-balloon-sculpture for a dollar to give it to alim later. the flower is so sweet. i love the balloon sculpturings. unique. even if the thing is common, the design is different. worm, flower, sword, cat, bangle, etc.

You see, I couldn't have possibly shouted at baha there so I decided to take my revenge once we reached home. However I reconsider it. If I were to take out on him, he will know he's in wrong so he'll do it more often to irritate people. There'll be a fight not only between him & I, but mum & I. she'll say I'm too childish for picking a fight with little people.

I told you geography is defying my effort. Another 2 more marks to the green line. & oh-oh. I'm sure to loose 6 marks for history. There was no time for assertion question! Another 4 marks less & that's it.

I was the only 1 from Sirius who went for syf on Wednesday. The rest were in npdp. I really felt awkard being the odd 1 out among the aries ma'ams. In the bus I talk so little that I crap alot when i reached home. heh.
At hta, it was fun to see my p6 friends back. So far, I saw jiha & bazi. ncc was also there. Damn smart.
Upon reaching school(it was already 1930), I planned to go home by the usual way if it wasn't too dark. Or else, I'll go the other way & take 2 buses. But ma'ams were worried for my safety. thank you ma'am for sending me home. Her dad was kind enough to drop me off at my home bustop. But I think it was too much. Who am I to them anyway.

I didn't expect such positive response from my classmates to help out in the amal at masjid alkaff kampong melayu. I too will be lending a hand but only for a little while 'cause I got lots of work to settle. People out there, come down & support the masjid. it'll be greatly appreciated. It's 1000-1600 I think.

If you happen to see girls whose hands are full of glittery pink, we they're from the STeam.

Sebenarnya aku lebih senang dengan sistem madrasah tahun-tahun yang lepas. Tahun ini, kami diberi banyak kertas latihan. Disebabkan itu, ustazah kurang mengajar. Apa yang kukesalkan, cara ini telah membesarkan jurang antara aku dan agama. Astarghfirullah. Apa tidaknya, dahulu kubermotivasi untuk ke madrasah kerana aku dapat dekatkan diriku kepadaNya dengan cara yang tenang. Maksudku, dengarkan ustazah menerangkan hukum-hukum, menceritakan sejarah, etc. dengan dihiasi gelak tawa. namun, kutidak akan menjadikannya sebagai alasan untuk menjauhkan diriku.
& you can't happily skip even for few days as it will affect your marks. & if you fail, you can't proceed on to the next level the following year. This is bad because as the years goes, people get busier don't you agree?

I've been eating a lot nowadays...help me.

It's 5 bucks! Yikes...like hello...I'm in need of money here...but it's ok. At least better than last year. Which is like 8 bucks for the presents alone?

Night of 7 april. Fateful day - tompok gave birth to 3 cuties. Which 1 of them I shall name it clone because it looks like miniature of tompok. they measure about 14cm in about less than 24h. their eyes are still not opened yet. By the way, tompok looks tired currently. of course, she's been in the box for 1+ day taking care of them without relievin herself.

I miss campfire! Where we shout our hearts out & have sheer fun. Guides were having campfire when we reached school after syf yesterday. It looked really grand. But it's no wonder...outsiders were invited.

Others may think it a nuisance having us cheering, shouting while they are trying to carry out activities. Actually I agree with them. I wish we could have the whole school to us & we can shout as loud as we want. Like ac. The whole school is just us on that Sunday. Yay. hmm...sounds like selfish. Sorry lar.

it's funny how shal got to get her hands on the making of the "recycled" turtle yesterday. within a minute the competition has started, hafe got her finger got her finger cut. the reserve, shal, was immediately called in. lol.
the wedding ceremony at the mph in my estate just now reminded me of kak nur's. today is her 1 week anniversary of her marriage & she's now on honeymoon. last week was her wedding so i lack sleep. my eyelids were heavy during boring lessons. this weekend, i can't really pay back my sleep because i went out the whole day of saturday. i can't reject to follow them to shal's house. because i kept rejecting to follow them out & i'm sick of it. i mean, followin them really is time consuming! & tomorrow, i'll be reaching school freakin early to help loading the gigantic turtle out of chry's car.
fortunately there's a little homework this weekend.

i've yet to return a library book which has expired 2 days ago. i got no time to read it nor return it.

the previous post i mentioned about how my friends have different personality. go see my friends' photos on friendster & you can also see differences. cedarians upload casual & memorable photos while eunosians generally have photos which depict their beauty. especially minahs they pose to show off their big eyes. there's a group of my old friends who are not active in friendster so they don't upload many photos.

congratulations to sirius who clinched 1st runner-up in the 3r competition! in the end, i came there only as a supporter. thank you everyone for making this a success one; the ma'ams who drank lotsa drinks to get us the bottles, ma'ams who helped us carry the box of bottles from syf besides carrying their own bags & shoebag in the rain, ma'ams who came after speech day, schoolmates who've contributed materials, parents who've drove us to & fro, and squadmates for their moral support, collecting the recycle materials & their ideas.
the 9 of us(exlcudin chry) headed for shal's house after the competition. the other half went after their goh training. shali's really a good host. her mum fetched us from east pring sec, where the competition was held. they were really noisy at the back of the car. then, shal's parents ordered pizza hut & bought some packet drinks. her parents din really mind our noise level. i mean, we were DAMN noisy. we left her house quite late even though they had to go for a function. her mum even said with a smile, "next time come earlier ah".